You know the saying “parenting is the hardest job in the world”? If you’re a parent, you’ll know that, despite all of the rewards and warm fuzzies that come with it, parenting often feels like job - and a non-paying job at that.
And, like a diligent employee or student, invested parents also want to grow and excel at their “job”.
Recently, in my freelance writers online group, someone asked about goal setting and I shared my informal system of grading myself at the end of (almost) every day. My fellow freelancers were amazed and impressed so I thought I’d share my informal system with you too!
Basically, each night, I break down my “life” into its major facets, ponder each one and then give myself an overall grade.
Here’s the Breakdown:
a) Work:
Did I accomplish everything I needed to do?
Was I proficient and professional?
Have I achieved my goals for the day/week?
How were my interactions with my colleagues, boss and team?
b) Chores/Housework/Home:
How many chores did I do?
Did the chores I assigned to others (namely my children) get done?
How messy is our house right now?
Are there enough groceries in the house?
c) Exercise:
How much exercise did I do today?
Was it simply walking or something more hardcore?
(If it was on the low end, I pursue something more impactful the following day like hot yoga or bike riding.)
d) Parenting:
Did I spend time with both of my kids?
Was the time spent quality time or quantity time - or both?
How were the interactions? Any fights, passive-aggressiveness or tension?
Did I look into whatever tasks I promised to do (school payment, dentist appointment, field trip, etc.) for them?
Is anyone’s birthday or special date coming up?
e) Other/Family/Bills:
Did I pay all the bills and taxes on time?
Did my partner and I spend any quality time together?
Do we have any couple plans coming up that I should think about?
Are any of my friends’ or family’s birthdays coming up?
I mark myself on each of these individual facets and then give myself an overall grade out of 10. I try to be realistic and not too hard on myself - in fact, I’ll internally praise myself if I note something particularly peachy that I’ve done — or not done such as holding my tongue!
The reason I do this when it comes to parenting, is to focus on the big picture — I explain this further in this post about the “end goal”. I try really hard to remember that parenting is not about the minutae that happens in a day but, rather, the overall feeling or connection we have with our children. I figure that, even if I have 10 good minutes with my daughter while driving her to school or 15 minutes hanging out with my son at Starbucks, that’s better than 10 hours of tension, passiveness, or indifference.
So, what do you think of my grading system? Is it something you might incorporate into your life? In any case, please like, comment, and share my post!
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Until next time parents… go easy on yourself.
Lisa